My husband and I have been married 16 years and haven’t done anything to prevent from getting pregnant. We started the adoption journey about 4 years ago, first with a private attorney that was all word of mouth for about 1 year; then (and still) with Adoption Network Law Center (ANLC). We’re still waiting! This year we started looking into invetro fertilization (IVF), but were directed to start with an Endocrinologist, which we start with the end of this month (October). We both were checked and there’s nothing medically preventing us from getting pregnant naturally, so for now, we’re still in the “trying” season until either we get pregnant or decide if we should do the endocrine and are waiting to adopt.

It’s hard not to get discouraged! We’ve tried to redirect our attention to getting stuff done to our house, traveling, focusing more on my daycare and getting in tune with the Lord. I’ve also posted our adoption websites on any and all blogs that I post a comment on hoping someone can help us get the word out.

It’s especially difficult during the holidays b/c, well, it’s the holidays, and plus it’s a reminder that we’re still not parents for another year.

My husband sometimes starts to doubt that it’s ever going to happen for us and wonders if God even wants us to be parents b/c it shouldn’t be this difficult.

It’s been challenging filling my daycare spots b/c the adoption can happen at any time and I would have to take some time off, so I think that makes potential daycare parents skittish.

When we signed up with ANLC, they said they average placing an infant every 3–6 months. After waiting 3 months, we were chosen but the birth mom changed her mind; after waiting 6 more months we were chosen but the birth mom changed her mind b/c she was told by a Dr that the baby might have spina bifida; this past June we were chosen again, but we didn’t have a peace–too many red flags; and then about 1 week later we received a call from ANLC asking if I’m registered Native American b/c they have a Native American baby, but the tribe wanted to place with a couple that is registered–well, you guessed it–I’m not registered and can’t get registered–my birth dad would have to register me–long story. So, here we are waiting, hoping and praying again.

We looked into Foster care, but we don’t think we could handle that since it’s not guaranteed that we’d get to keep the children. We were told that they were looking for “safe houses” until the parents got their acts together and the kids would go back to the parents. We don’t think we’re emotionally ready for something like that. We want babies we can call our own.

We are trying to adopt domestically.

I’ve been praying for twins (a boy and a girl) to adopt and for the Lord to give me courage to be pregnant, open my womb and give us twins biologically. I’ve always wanted 4 kids. My husband is open to however many the Lord has planned for us.

Thanks for listening.

Stacey

I love your site! Extremely informative and helpful.

Judy

I actually have been reading your blog. And I love how you write. I am happy to know that my site is of help. I think that many parents can draw from life experiences to “validate and support a child in way that is very important.” I’d love to come speak in BC!

Judy

I saw you were following me on twitter.

I have read through your site…WOW.

What an inspiration you are.

My husband is adopted and we hope to one day be an adoptive family.

If you have read my blog (which is very new) or will continue to read my blog, I hope to touch on some of the same issues you have.

What a wonderful resource I have found!

I was not adopted, but was abused and neglected, and both my husband and myself have had to deal with many abandonment issues. I always thought this would work against us as potential foster/adoptive parents. I saw it as a weakness. I am now coming to realize these experiences may be invaluable to our relationship with our future “kids”.

We have no fantasies about becoming adoptive parents and are very…not excited, that’s not the right word…but we feel we can validate and support a child in way that is very important.

I look forward to reading more of what you have to say and if you are ever in the west coast BC region of Canada we would both love to hear you speak.

Many blessings,
Bee

I saw you as a speaker on the parenting summit–I am also on there. Love what you are doing and would be happy to connect! Let me know!

Best,

V