Do you belong to a tribe? Several? Many?
According to Merriam-Webster, a tribe can be defined as, “a social group comprising numerous families, clans, or generations together with slaves, dependents, or adopted strangers,” or “a group of persons having a common character, occupation, or interest.” Seth Godin further explains the importance of tribes, the need to connect, and how it is human nature to join them.
The Internet has made joining a tribe even easier. Physical and geographical barriers no longer exist. You can belong to a tribe that has members scattered all over the globe.
A tribe has tribal wisdom, communal wisdom. Members of the tribe can share that wisdom with one another.
Stop and make a mental list of the tribes you are part of, for example, your family, friends, a book club, or a political party. Why do you feel compelled to be part of this group? What do they do for you? How do they support you?
Is one of your tribes adoptive parents? I hope so. I really do.
Why? Because you need an adoptive parent tribe. You really do.
You need to spend time with other parents who can connect with you in a way that non-adoptive parents cannot. Other adoptive parents have and are experiencing many of the same things you are. They have many of the same questions and concerns you have. They have experienced loss. They have been through a similar journey to have their child(ren) join them. Like you, they find often find themselves having to advocate for adoption.
Parents: Consider expanding your tribe with others touched by adoption—birthmothers and adult adoptees, for instance. Or joining such a tribe. Doing so can provide additional information and ideas on adoptive parenting and broaden your perspective.